Tuesday, December 31, 2013

写给2013的自己




#陌生的2013

妳告别了蓝裙制服
告别了系在马尾上的粉蓝色蝴蝶结
告别了坐了三年的课室后的那一个角落
告别了写满了社团活动的时间表
告别了和你在课堂上偷懒嬉闹的朋友
妳,突然慌了
不知所措




#哭泣的2013

看着朋友们陆陆续续开学了
妳开始烦了
妳奢望的太多太多
当妳发现其实一切只是妳小时候单纯的梦想
妳,哭了
妳看清了这个世界
学会了放下




#书桌前的2013

妳很幸运
得到了全额奖学金
它重新给了妳实现梦想的一丝希望
妳再一次笑了
但也尝到了前所未有的压力
每一天呆在书桌前的日子并不好受




#朦胧的2013

妳的未来还是很迷茫
妳为了它哭了无数次
很怀疑现在的自己究竟为了什么而坚持着
虽然梦想重新被点燃了
但妳也很明白它随时都会迎风而去
可是
妳很执着
并不想就这样放开




#再一次疯狂的2013

新的环境新的面孔对妳来说是一个极大的挑战
有一段时间妳真的觉得自己不行了
觉得自己的决定是错误的
生活失去了方向
但妳遇到了可以与妳共同患难的朋友
一起诉苦
一起偷懒
一起熬夜
妳很开心
很满足




#再一次相信的2013

妳想妳大概又疯了
或许吧
但妳并不后悔
谢谢你的等待
妳告诉自己要认真
是时候真心回报了




#成长了的2013

海浪滔滔的一年来到了尾声
哭过了笑过了
告诉自己 妳长大了
谢谢自己一直坚持着 努力着
一切都只是个开始呢




“不要这么容易就想放弃就像我说的 追不到的梦想换个梦不就得了”

告诉2014年的自己
凡事只要尽力做得最好就行了
别在意身旁的人步伐走得有多快
自己走自己的路
享受着自己的天空
就好 :)

生活对有梦想的人
依然是温暖的


#永别了2013


#你好啊2014

__juzvivien

Thursday, July 11, 2013

时光机。



考完中五大考后,知道自己并没有那么快就要继续升学的打算,所以决定了去打份工,赚些零用钱买自己想买的东西。起初自己并没有想要当老师或助教的念头,在家里自己的 “没耐性” 可是出了名的,要我面对着一堆东奔西跳的小孩一整天?我办不到。可是话说工作难找啊,我不得不承认,从收银员到服务员,我竟然找不到工!真是丢脸到~ 所以在无可奈何的情况下,我决定了,我去当老师!


我任教的地方是一间托儿所兼补习中心,说当老师好像不怎么对,因为我的工作简直就是妈妈!从检查功课到添饭洗碗碟到催促学生们去冲凉准备去学校,下午还要帮幼儿园的学生洗澡泡奶带他们上楼睡午觉,无一不是妈妈坐的事。总之,我无缘无故地当了五个月的实习妈妈 @@


以前的我很不了解,为什么老师一点点就要罚,妈咪一点点就要骂。可是现在我懂了,彻彻底底地了解了。小孩子的 pattern seriously BANYAK! 前一秒认为他是个乖孩子,怎知一转身 —— 忘了我刚才说的话吧。。。


依稀记得第一天上班的情况,校长把我安排去教三年级的班。她一说完,我就收到了另一位老师传来的同情的目光。心想 “ 很恐怖的吗?”,但还没来得及想别的,我就站在三年级课室的门口了。深深地吸了一大口气,打开门,一个不明物体朝我的方向飞了过来,正中我的额头!天啊,世界大战吗?我连班上都还没来得及踏进一步就被将和自己相处五个月的学生攻击了。但是这一位老师可没那么好欺负哦,反攻是必然的。于是,我使出了老师最拿手的武器 —— 给功课!哈哈哈


因为这样,我发现了自己的一个弱点,那就是心太软!学生求我别给那么多作业,我就好吧好吧可怜你们。求我别告诉校长,我也好吧好吧再给你一次机会 *虽然已原谅过他们十次* 哎,你们就别再求老师了啊好吗?老师的心硬不来啊 /_\






#洗澡篇

一开始上班,似乎什么事都很容易上手,唯有一件事让我有些不知所措 —— 帮幼儿园的小孩洗澡!十八年来,我好像不曾帮任何人冲过凉啊,该从何处下手呢?况且他是个是个是个小男孩勒。。。只记得最后我按了些洗发精和沐浴露在他们身上乱刷乱抹,再用水乱射一会儿就大功告成了。原来帮小孩洗澡的感觉是这样的啊哈哈。






#蟑螂篇

另一个难题就是在开启冷气的那一瞬间,随时都会有蟑螂飞出来。从小就被我姐和我妹训练到看见蟑螂就是要叫要喊,其实自己也不清楚自己到底怕不怕蟑螂,就只是很自然的 “啊啊啊啊啊~!” 然后逃离现场,而且还是带头跑的那个,真的是丢脸丢到一个极点 TT 记得有一次,校长听到我们的喊叫声跑了上来,然后就骂学生们 “做什么喊到这样大声,蟑螂罢了嘛怕什么?” 然后顺手打了几位她认为喊得最大声的学生。厄厄我想说对不起啦,喊得最大声的好像是老师我啊 ><




#大小姐篇

想像一下,我们时常在偶像剧中看到的大小姐脾气发作的那一幕,有什么丢什么的那一幕。对了,就是那一幕!你知道吗,它竟然活生生地在我眼前上演了勒。会把孩子送到托儿所来的父母大多数都比较宠孩子,没时间陪伴他们嘛,也就这样养成了他们大小姐大少爷的脾气。我们能做的就是劝他们,告诉他们什么是对的错的。说真的,看到他们这样是很气,但也很心疼,现今的小孩怎么啦?






#笛子篇

还记得小学时期因为看不懂乐谱上的豆豆,时常要硬着脸皮求朋友帮我在音符上写上 ABC,也因此激起了我要在上中学时参加乐团的心愿。就在一天下午,我的五年级学生在为他们学校的笛子考试做准备,我走到他们旁边做了下来,他们就问:“老师你会吹吗?” “会啊” 我说。“我们不信,你吹吹看。” 在他们的世界中,老师就是很老的,比你大很多的那种。可是我和他们只不过是七年之差啊,我上的小学课程和他们的差不多而已。我二话不说,拿起笛子,翻开他们的音乐课本,吹了他们还没学到的 《捉泥鳅》。他们个个睁大了双眼看着我,然后 “哇,老师你很厉害勒。” “老师你还记得怎么按哦” 老实说,我也很惊讶自己还一清二楚地记得笛子的按法,不过听到你们这么说,我还是有种莫名的感触啦,毕竟以前的我根本吹不出啊。自那以后,那一堆学生就会时不时地要我教他们吹笛子,我当然乐意啊!p/s: 也很暗爽哈哈 XD




#犹如亲人般的老板

开办这间托儿所的夫妇都是退休了的校长,待人很好。我刚去上班时他们还会问我 “吃早餐了没?还没的话可以去拿面包吃哦。” 有时在洗碗碟时,她会叫我先去吃饭,她来洗这些碗碟。午觉时间,他们会叫我跟着小孩们一起睡,休息一会儿。孩子们吃面包的时候,他们会一直要我去泡茶喝。说真的,我超级不好意思的,有时还会想我是不是来做工的啊?





话说人类是有感情的动物,我和那堆小鬼早已远远超越了老师和学生之间该有的感情。我也没有从一开始就把老师的尊严挂在身上,老是加入他们像大孩子一样和他们一起玩一起闹 *虽然最后被罚的是他们哈哈* 他们有时会告诉我他们的心事,跟我说他们要学这个学那个好烦啊。有的把我称为好朋友并非老师。还有几个六年级的男孩看到我时都会说 “ GD 的老婆 hello! ” 我觉得我好像在一瞬间多了好多好多的朋友,感觉很棒。:)


这五个月就如乘坐了时光机回到自己的童年,看着他们就宛如看着小时候的自己一样。听着他们的对话,有时候会想起自己曾经也说过同样的一句话。我们都有过思想单纯的时候。从他们身上学了好多好多。一开始去上班赚钱的初衷早被抛到九霄云外去了,能认识他们,教教书,和他们一起玩闹,我赚到了金钱买不到的感情,满足了。



"Teacher i'll miss you, must come back next time ok?"

"I will."



从一开始的烦啊,很气啊,到现在的不舍,似乎过了一段很长很长的时间。同学们啊,给老师一点点时间打点大学先修班的事然后老师会拨空回去帮忙的。约定咯。:)



和学生们假期时一起做的手工


幼儿班学生当中最乖的一个 :)






我并不后悔没有向他人一样匆忙地继续升学,因为我在这五个月里过得很充实很满足,嗯。




__juzvivien


Friday, December 21, 2012

full stop.

Was watching running man halfway and i realised there's only three days left to 21st December yes it's world end! Dont realy believe in world end anyways but i still decided to complete my annual blog post before it realy comes. Ya u'll say no point blogging as everything, the whole world the whole universe will gone after world ends but well who knows maybe there's still internet after world ends and my blog is the only website that can access? oh well nothing is impossible right? and yeah i myself prefer disappointed rather than regrets, i dont want myself to regret for not completing my annual blog post before world ends and i hope myself get to reminisce all the memories throughout this year before the world realy ends. i bet three days will be enough for it eh? ok i shall stop crapping and starts squeezing my brain juice n vomit all my memories out now. this blog post will be abit hmm messy? haha hope u guys dont mind cause i'll just type out everything that comes to my mind. hmm perhaps my deepest secrets too? haha ok here comes my super longgggg blog post teehee.

okie in case i'll miss anything lets start with january. hmm i remember i cant realy adapt myself when school starts. form 5? it's too fast! the last year of my secondary school and i'll be facing the scaring spm this year. every teacher that came into our class also talked about spm spm spm. hey is it that important? i dont want to be nerd anymore this year, i've tried to be a nerd during form 4 and it's sucks! so lifeless omg everyday dates books books books and u wanna me to repeat this for another year?! NO WAY! so i told myself no matter what i must truly enjoy myself this year and i guess i did haha.

changed my deskmate this year opps sorry lihan i cant throw grace aside haha she's new in our class rite? so after two years finally we get to sit together again yipeee. describe her? haha hmm a happy go lucky girl? tbh i cant find anyone who hates her she's too nice for everyone. thank you for being my deskmate again i thought we have no chance to sit together again after entering different classes during form 3. thanks for borrowing me your notes i know my writing speed damn slow and oh yea i admit that im lazy haha i prefer copying at home. and yeah thanks for helping me whenever teachers called my name and even help me to keep an eye on teacher while i slept in class oppsiee i've no idea why my desk is more comfortable than my bed this year lol i prefer sleeping in school.



lol ok i shall log in my fb now cant realy remember what've happened in january. owh ok i went kai's hse during cny with my lovely orchestra darlings. chatted alot with hui wen cause i prefer chatting than gambling. we sang alot cny's songs and helped them to clap off beats haha. reg brought me to upstairs coz thr's lion dance. she played kai's piano. we ate alot the food was nice. we tried to let the egg stand but failed. hmm i did enjoyed myself that night.




yeah i still remember i invited my classmate to my hse for bbq party! i went lihan hse in the morning then weiqin's dad fetched us to my hse. they played my wii but ugh sumthing wrong with the wii so end up we chatted and played with lucas. i remember lucas loves ryan alot haha. reg and waiching got sore throat that day but well they still ate alot. we wrote our names and wishes and signed the 'kong ming deng' lol i dont what it called in english hmm lantern? a wonderful night it was :)




oh well i cant go month by month alr i think my brain cant function well. i can just flash back my memories by seeing those pictures in my fb and phone. pictures do helps alot so i must take more pictures next time haha.

ok next it's orchestra valentine's sale! it's a little bittt better than last year coz we dont need to fold the boxes by ourselves. but somehow u still can get mad painting especially when valentine's day is just around the corner. still remember the day we went to jia wei n jian han's house, their living room was in a mess lol some busy painting some busy shellac-ing and some busy writing alphabets. luckily we still manage to finish everything on time durh of course la haha really enjoyed working hard with them :)




move on to the next picture haha ok i saw my first medal yes it's my first medal wootz. it's abit shocking cause i usually dont invlove myself in sports but well as i say i must enjoy myself this year so i try to join as much activities as i could. so yeah i actually can run haha it's my hidden potential hohoho XD




coming up next it's our uniform changing day! i've always wanted to try to wear pengawas uniform and finally i get to try it haha and i think i look good in it lol ok tell u guys a secret, i actually went for pengawas interview when i was in form 1 but failed i didnt get to become a pengawas hehe teacher's comment was im too shy lol okayyy so i was really happy when i get to put on pengawas uniform it's the feeling of dream come true aww





skip skip skip

ahh ok it's my bday woohoo! it's the most special bday celebration i've ever had so far coz it's in the middle of chinese society camp. was touched not because of the surprise *i've alr knew it earlier lol* but the wishes i got from everyone. i didnt know i have so much frens srsly. thank you everyone of u who cares abt me THANK YOU i do appretiate everyone of u :) oh ya not to forget abt the gigantic kitty birthday card from orchestra *thx reg n jiaying* and the 'wedding' birthday pinky album with wishes from all my frens *thx lihan vv ng grace n etc* how wonderful it was. owh ya lastly thx celion for accompanying me to sleep haha i srsly had headache la that night plus i knew u guys...okok too much alr haha anyways thx again ba cant mention everyone one by one here but u know laaaaa XD






ok back to chinese society hmm 3rd camp? i think so...so yeah i became secretary again ._. i duno why i just love secretary even tho i know thr's alot alot alot works for secretary but i still prefer secretary SO STUPID RIGHT? haih hopeless la u vivien nvm at least thr's sumone did praised me before haha right mr G? maybe it's because secretary no need to talk no need to give ideas what u need to do is just write write write type type type and report report report so easy right haha oh well too far alr la come back come back what alr ar.......oh ya camp hmm for me it wasnt realy fun coz i havta take pics again yee i no like la need to run here run there sumore my camera damn heavy ishhh but then end up still ok la i did enjoyed myself plus i did sakai with celion and ziqing ma haha aww we're san gu liu por XP




randomly saw this pic omg im so hungry but it's almost 4am now >&lt;


okie seterusnya, saya dah lupa bila lah we went to UPM *it's not universiti pertanian malaysia lol* for education fair but i prefer calling it as shooting trip cause what we did the most thr was took pictures instead of visiting the booths over thr aiya what to do the edu fair damn lousy la those colleges i dun even seen their names before ._. so we kept on taking pictures and our trip came to an end. too bad reg n zhiying cant join us coz they're too lucky haih :(





lol ok i found another way to get back my memories omg chai wai ching i love die u liao hahaha kindly visit her blog and click the nuffnang for her www.cheriing.blogspot.com see i so good help u promote ur blog haha cause i need ur pictures XD

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ughhh i shudnt read her blog omg too much memories ottokae TT ok i shall take a rest now continue tmr!



whee im back! ok today is the last day before world end so i must finish this blog post as soon as possible @@

we celebrated reg's bday earlier this yr i forgot why alr i think bcoz of exam ba. it's a day full of surprises for both of us haha i got my instax camera on that day yay and i think reg din expect so many ppl would be thr to cele bday for her thx lihan and waiching who planned all these. and and and we watched titanic in 3D woohoo finally~





hmm i think i got not enuf time alr so i just post pictures ba :)



joined volleyball competition but i didnt really play just join for fun haha XD




went jiahui's hse for cooking lol we're perfect housewives in the future yay!





sports day! :)


ahaha melissa so cute 



senior page photo shooting ;)
AWESOME IS OUR MIDDLE NAME! 





lihan and alvin's bday celebration @old town bk




30 hours famine camp @MMU






science expo during sc & maths week!
cant find the group pic @@

i dont care i wanna work in lab in the future if i din die la XP





orchestra 5th band camp!
and my last band camp too TT




orchestra hari koko performance


first and last performance with my juniors haih



Te Amore Musica <3 p="p">




glad to meet my primary skul classmates, they're so supportive :)




orchestra farewell @ kai's hse




i hate goodbye :(



chinese society committees '12 
we got best society of the yr again :)





 orchestra form 5s~




coming up next is sakais! aww my life in 2012 really really full of them leh. they're like my real siblings my best frens and my best ji muis. we start forming this group and start chatting since 18/7 until now and most importantly we chat EVERYDAY. we laugh tgt, zat ppl tgt, helping one another on homeworks, give supports to one another, comfort one another, hang gai tgt, gila lengzais tgt, siao kpop tgt and sakais tgt whee thank you guys love u all so so much! 







sampat-ing in school with grace and reg haha

 hey reg i indirectly asked ur permission to post it rmb? i said i wanna post everything XP




my very first interview  @ sunway uni

met my primary school besties thr :D


orchestra mesyuarat agung pibg performance :)




last day of school :(





gracey's bday :D




outing with ji muis ^^






a visit to kidzania
my last chance qualified as a KID haha





last chinese lesson with ms tan :)





mpyo's concert
support ryan hehe




i actually asked myself what i want to do if i only left one day in my life. it's too short for me to fulfill all my dreams so yeah i thought of a thing that im able to finish within a day, which is thank all my frens personally! they're too important in my life i mean who can live without frens? so to every of my frens THANK YOU VERY MUCH! im glad to know u guys and i appreciate everyone of u. thanks again from the deepest of my heart :)

ok it's time to spam some pics with my lovely frens hehe...

viviens

jason low

joshua wong

yi kang

viviens n lihan

ryan

rauf

weiqin

kai

leyi

joyi

zhiying

flutist

regina aka my best listener n advisor

celion aka my dear

wan qing

jia ying

jia wei

ying ting

beng

deb

kewei

waiching

alvin

jian han

gracey pohteng n ern

beloved flutist :D

marcus

and lastly

 gracey and reg haha



ahhhh finally i done my annual blog post teehee regina n weiqin ar satisfy tak? i hope it's long enuf if i've more time i can make it longer de but too bad it's 21.12.12 alr

aww hope world end wont come la i haven work at mcd haven visit paris haven earn my own money haven buy enuf hello kitty etc etc etc



k la i'll stop here if thr's world end then see u guys in my next life la if thr's no world end then hmm see u guys tmr haha buhbyeeee ~




__juzvivien